A Practical Guide to Checking ID's

Over the last few weeks, I have been dealing with a terrifying issue: underage drinkers. While I did all the research and prepared to train my staff on this, I searched the web for articles on spotting fakes. To my surprise there is VERY little information on this. So here it is. Strap in folks, this may be a long one, but I do this for my industry brothers and sisters.

As many of you may know, Washington, DC, is an international city. It is also a college town. As many of you also know, the legal drinking age in the US is 21. Now, before the words cross your lips, I am not particularly interested in arguing the merits of European drinking models, but some of you don't know the penalty of underage drinking on a bar or restaurant. In DC, here is the penalty breakdown:

First offense
Venue
Fine: $1,000 (Min) - $2,000 (Max)
License suspension (How long they shut you down): 5 days
Other: 5 consecutive day suspension may be stayed if all employees complete alcohol training in 3 months
Bartender
Upon conviction for the first offense, be fined not more than $1,000, or imprisoned up to 180 days, or both

Second offense
Venue
Fine: $2,000 (Min) - $4,000 (Max)
License suspension: 10 days
Other: 6 days of consecutive suspension may be stayed if all employees complete alcohol training in 3 months
Bartender
(2) Upon conviction for the second offense committed within 2 years from the date of any such
previous offense, be fined not more than $2,500, or imprisoned up to 180 days, or both;

Third offense
Venue
Fine: $4,000 (Min) - $10,000 (Max)
License suspension: 15 consecutive days
Other: Board may revoke license
Bartender
(3) Upon conviction for the third or any subsequent offense committed within 2 years from the
date of any such previous offense, be fined not more than $5,000, or imprisoned up to one year,
or both.

(Fourth offense, they don't even list fines. By then, the board bends you over. It's done.)

This is really serious stuff. Now, I wanted to look up some stuff on exactly how ABRA conducts sting operations. This is not exactly the easiest information to get, and between talking with fellow industry professionals and calling the ABRA offices, here is what I gathered.

1. The All-famous sting operation
ABRA will use underage agents to come in and try to purchase alcohol. Technically, from what I have understood, they cannot present you with a fraudulent ID; that is entrapment. When asking the ABRA official on the phone if they can present a fraudulent ID, she expertly dodged the question. It is my impression that they conduct a sting with the follow criteria:

• The ID is expired (this is the most popular)
• The ID is valid, but is not the ID of the person presenting it to you.
• The ID is valid, but the person is underage and you deserve to be shut down for your carelessness.

2. Fishing

I have had ABRA come into my establishment, look around for someone who looks underage, and ask for their ID. I was never sure if it was legal for them to do that, but in the law it states:

25-801(f) ABRA investigators may request and check the identification of a patron inside of or attempting to enter an establishment with an alcohol license. ABRA investigators may seize evidence that substantiates a violation under this title, which shall include seizing alcoholic beverages sold to minors and fake identification documents used by minors.

So what will happen is that ABRA officers will come in and ask for ID. If they find someone, the results can be bad. But here is the question that I am up against: How the hell am I supposed to catch all of the fakes?

This is a daunting task in the District of Columbia. We have a high volume of college kids with disposable incomes, so they can afford a fake ID that will cost $300 or more. Moreover, there are many people with international ID's; how the hell am I supposed to be able to tell if an ID from Honduras is legit? Can I even accept a foreign ID? Well, yes and no. The law says:

(3) For the purpose of determining valid representation of age, each person shall be required to present to the establishment owner or representative at least one form of valid identification, which shall have been issued by an agency of government (local, state, federal, or foreign) and shall contain the name, date of birth, signature, and photograph of the individual. 

What this says is that technically if it is a government issued ID, then you are a go. Keep in mind that an "International Drivers License"is not. Sorry. Also a copy of a document (like a copy of a passport) is also not a document. A picture on their phone is not a document. With even a basic understanding of photoshop I can make my ID say that I have blonde hair, blue eyes, and was born in 1886. The moral of the story on Foreign Government ID's is to use your discretion. In Boston, they won't anything but US passports or MA ID's.  I have seen doctored passports, State id's and foreign ID's. The key is to reduce your risk, and not be afraid to say "no."

Tricks and Tips

Now that we have gone over the law, lets fast forward. 

I had a gaggle of girls come into my venue a few weeks ago. Two of the places down the street had been hit by ABRA in a sting. Another friend of mine was going into court for ABRA fishing in his place and they caught someone. His place had a competent door guy, but unfortunately the Chinese are making very very good fakes right now. I asked him what he was arguing in court, and he told me to read the law. I did, and here is what I found:

25-783 (b) A licensee or his agent or employee shall take steps reasonably necessary to ascertain whether  any person to whom the licensee sells, delivers, or serves an alcoholic beverage is of legal drinking age. Any person who supplies a valid identification document showing his or her age to be the legal drinking age shall be deemed to be of legal drinking age. 

What does this actually say? The words you need to pay attention to is "steps reasonably necessary." This tells me some important information. First it tells me that there is a minimum expectation of diligence required, and it tells me that I AM NOT A FEDERAL AGENT. The argument my friend is putting in court is that there are fake ID's of such a high quality coming out that they are taking reasonable measures to detect them but technology simply cannot keep up.  So, here are your two levels of ID checking that I recommend.

Level 1: Basic Restaurant/bar venue, medium volume, non-college area/ non-city

• The key to detecting a fake ID is knowing the answer before you ask the question. 90% of the time I catch an underage or a fake, I had flagged them the moment that they walked in and told my server I want to ID them myself. Trust your instincts and go in for the close look.
• Remember that you don't know these people, and they may be trying to commit a crime (if the police catch them using a fake ID, first offense is a $300 fine and/or 90 suspension of license) that can put yours and your coworkers jobs on the line. Service only extends to those guests who don't disrespect and jeopardize my establishment by defrauding me. 
• Look for the telltale psychological signs of someone being 18/19/20. They aren't going to look comfortable, you will notice them looking around a lot. Announce yourself as a manager and see if they get scared. Ooze confidence and see if they look like they're going to shit themselves. 
• Look for the telltale physical signs of someone being 18/19/20. For men, check their hairline, look for any signs of recession. See if they have shaved today - most men have to shave every day or they will quickly get stubble, (unless your a manly man like me with a large unkempt beard that pisses your wife off.) Look under their eyes or on their brow for signs of aging. Remember, drinking AGES you. 
• Watch as they take out their ID. On most purses and wallets there is a transparent spot for the ID to go. Kids are usually arrogant and lazy, so they will sometimes have their real ID in that spot and pull a fake from another place in the wallet. Also see what else they have in their wallet - look for credit cards. You may need to ask for a second form of ID or a card, and if they say they don't have one, you know the ID is fake.
• Feel the ID. Before I even look at it (I like to maintain eye contact while I slightly bend the ID in my hands. What's that I smell? FEAR.) But seriously feel it. The same way that experienced bartenders can feel exactly how much is left in a bottle by weight, experienced ID checkers know what each state's plastic feels like. I had a Serbian guy who spotted Virginia fake ID's by flicking them with his fingernail a few times while holding it up to his ear. Imagine a big bald scary guy who sounds like Ivan Drago saying "The ID will exsplain to me if they are lyink." He knew the sound so well he could tell if the plastic was wrong. Pretty amazing. I saw this same guy punch someone so hard that their shoes flew 20 feet across the room. Also pretty amazing. 
• If the Id is cracked or hole punched, or the integrity is damaged in any way, it is not valid. 
• Make sure that the ID fulfills the law. There are 5 different qualifications that must be met.
• Must be issued by a government (International Drivers License is not valid)
• Must have a name
• Must have a picture
• Must have a date of birth
• Must have a signature
• Next, look at the person. Then look at the picture. Look at the person again, and back to the picture. The next part is seeing if the picture is the person in front of you. Be careful; older siblings will often times pass their ID's down. I look for things like nostrils, ears, cheekbones, and jaw structure. These are things that are normally different in siblings. Don't get caught up with stuff like eye shape or hair color; any girl knows how to change these things with makeup and other cosmetics. If you look at a person twice, the fake ID guest will usually start to get nervous. Pay attention to non-verbal cues. 
• Check the date of birth: they must be born before todays date, 21 years ago. If your staff cant do math, hang up a sign with date before. 
• Check the expiration date. If the ID is expired, you cannot serve that guest. No exceptions. Well, ok there is one exception. If you have someone come to drink and they clearly lived through at least one world war, serve them. Worst case scenario is that they're Benjamin Button but that would be a pretty compelling argument in court. 
• If one of these things isn't working, or you just don't feel quite confident, ask them if they have another form of ID. 9 times out of 10 they will. This is where watching their wallet comes into play. They will usually take it out and start looking, but then have to scramble to see what they can show you. Just yesterday I had someone sort through their wallet looking for a second form and I saw a drivers license from a different state. I said "oh, there's another form of ID!" and he quietly walked out of the bar. If they don't have another form, ask if they have a credit card with their name on it; it will let you gauge the quality of the ID if it's fake. By now, trust your instincts.
• THE FINAL TEST: if you still aren't sure after all of that, call the bluff and tell them that you can't accept their ID. Most kids that are underage drinkers will quietly say "Ok, that's fine." and just be glad that you are not taking their fake from them. Anyone who has a real ID will likely make a pretty big fuss. This is where you discover how big of balls they have. I had a girl in the other night and I told her I wouldn't take her ID and she said "Well, if you're going to be an asshole about it, then fine." To which I responded: "It is your right to have the police verify your identity if you would like. In fact, if they do, your drinks are on me for the inconvenience." This is the part where you discover how far they want to take it. She dropped the issue immediately and I told her that she needed to leave; nobody but my friends can call me an asshole in my place and stay. This is true, a police officer can verify an ID for you. 
• The moral of the story is that these are what I have always used as my restaurant/small bar guidelines, and I have never been busted by ABRA as a bartender or manager.

Level 2: Lounge/Nightclub/higher volume establishment

• Black lights should be int he tool box of every manager. Not only are they the standard for checking for increased authenticity, but they are a great way to see what needs to be cleaned. If you are a manager and think your place is clean, I dare you to put a black light in your bathroom or in the walls of hallways and see how clean it really is. 
• Grab an app called "MobileID Guide" for your phone. It is $.99 cents, easy to quickly navigate state ID's and each state will have microprint and blacklight things to look for. It's a great tool for US ID's and it updates as well. This is most useful for checking for blacklight patterns on the ID. 

• ID scanners are a must-have for any truly large venue (500+ people) but are sometimes an unnecessary expense for a place like mine that will have 150-200 people on a saturday night. I found a great little app called "barZapp" for $1.99 that will scan the barcode of an ID using your smartphone camera. It will tell you the name, birthday, and give you an opinion if the ID is valid or not. It's a terrific tool as a last means for an ID that I am 80% sure is legit but just want some additional insurance. Between that and Mobile ID guide, accompanied with some experience and common sense, this is what I see as reasonable steps.

The one question that I couldn't get answered by ABRA is on foreign government ID's. Many college kids will either have an international fake or be truly international with no US form of ID. This can be a tricky problem. The general consensus that I got was that ABRA will not ever put forth a fake foreign ID. Make sure it's not expired and go from there. The argument is that I am not a federal agent trained in detecting counterfeit ID's from countries across the world. If you are really worried I would go to www.driverslicenseguide.com and order one of their international ID books; just be careful to keep an updated one nearby.  If a US ID scans, passes blacklight, has all the points of ID then I think I have taken more than reasonable steps to detect a valid ID and have exhausted my other options.

This is a ton of information, I know. I am going to try to keep this as a living document that I will be changing. If anyone has any questions, comments, tips or tricks, please re-post and leave comments. 

Returning...with tail between legs. A favor:

Well, it has been an embarrassingly long time since I have updated this. The unfortunate truth about this industry is that it is about proper time management and updating the blog took a back seat to the responsibilities of running a venue. I have excuses for days; I've been writing a cook book with my wife. We released a brand new food and cocktail menu at Mate Lounge. All of these things mean nothing, after all, I hate excuses. So let's move on.

New cocktail menu! We have some really exciting stuff on my newest menu. It's nice to know that I can still push myself to hit new goals and expand my craft. As always, I owe all of it to the continued support of friends and family, and of course, the Bear.

This bring us to the tail between legs part. I need your help.

Washington City Paper does a "Best of" contest every year when you can nominate and then vote for any venue in different categories. I implore, beg, plead: please vote for us. We have 3 categories that we are fighting for, and every single vote counts.

Polls close FEBRUARY 27 so PLEASE vote now!

Step one: Click this Link: http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/bestofpoll
Step Two: Scroll Down to "Food and Drink" and click "81 more"
Step Three: Vote for the following three catagories:
Best Cocktail Selection: Mate Lounge
Best Restaurant: Mate Lounge
Best Mixologist: Eric Tollar

You have to sign up and it takes a moment of your time, but this is really important to me.

As payment, here is a picture of my adorable dog.

Stay Thirsty,
Eric Tollar

Happy Thanksgiving (from my office.)

I'm writing from my office today. Yes, It's thanksgiving. There are about 20 people sitting at my bar and I'm missing my favorite pair of gloves that, much like most of my clothes, I've had for over 10 years. Let me rewind.

The holidays are a tough time for my family. For me, it's pretty simple. All year long people look forward to their christmas parties. People plan reunions at their local bars with their old friends the day before thanksgiving and the night after the big meal. My doors must be open, and they are. The holidays are about spending time with your loved ones, and it has never stopped being difficult on my parents, extended family, and now my wife, that during these designated family times I am often entertaining in my place of business. It is less difficult for me because I am used to it and fundamentally understand how important it is to be open even on the days when you will only have a few customers. Here is why...

I touched a table (industry talk for visiting and checking in on...) of a young couple, indulging in sushi and the most expensive sake I have to offer. I like to spend a few minutes with everyone who walks through my doors, and today was no exception.

"I burnt my turkey to hell," the young man chuckles as his eyes dart nervously towards his wife. "It was inedible. The cat sniffed it once and ran off." They both laugh. I come back to my office and realize that I have unwittingly given them a night they will never forget. "The thanksgiving that he ruined the turkey and they went out for sushi instead." They may one day tell their children about this night. They left happy. My bar is full of people who either don't celebrate thanksgiving or don't have a family near enough to celebrate them with.

I am asked often what the best part of this job is. The answer is simple: food and drink are the punctuation of our lives. People propose over dinner. They celebrate in restaurants. They meet their future wives or husbands and create memories with their friends. I am not so egotistical to want to be associated with these memories. Rather, I know that I have provided them with the stage to create it themselves. These couples will never remember my name, their server, perhaps even the name of the restaurant. But it will be there, along with that moment of happiness that could very well carry them through some immensely dark times. This is something to be proud of.

Someone asked me what I am thankful for. The honest answer is that I am thankful to come to work on the holidays. I am thankful that while I am still young, I can work hard to create a life for myself and my family that will give them every opportunity. I am thankful to the owners of this company, Farees and Mauricio, who believe in me and trust me to do right by their name and reputation. I suffer now so that in the years to come, I can enjoy the time off, and let some other young man or woman put in the sacrifice that I have paid forward. Mauricio told me something I will never forget: "You work your ass off in your 20's, get rich in your 30's, and start to enjoy your life in your 40's." I am in my office on this Thanksgiving for my unborn children and their grandparents-to-be.

As I was touching my tables, I saw a man that is always outside of the Lounge. I went out to say hi, like I always do. He talked about how cold he is, and how hard it is to live where he does; right now it's in an alley.

There are some brief shining moments in your life that you can do something that is really a deed that will result directly in something important. I marched inside, grabbed my favorite wool gloves from my coat, and brought them back out. I asked if he needed anything else, and he said, "blankets and socks would be great." My staff, who I have come to respect immensely, didn't miss a beat. One of my servers told me she would be bringing extra blankets tomorrow, and I know I have socks in my closet that I no longer use. I am so proud to work with some of these people.

I am not writing this for accolades or because I want any of you to think me a good person. I write this to express a point. The message on this holiday is: be thankful. Do not give because society expects it, give because you can, and many cannot. That is the point. I am so thankful for my wonderful family and I will forever be sorry that I can't spend this holiday with them, but I work so that one day I can be there as much as I would like. I work because it allows me to give, and allows me to help. Show compassion for others that have done nothing to deserve it because it makes you a bit more human. Be thankful that you can be warm and full, surrounded be people that love you.

It makes me happy knowing that my Mom and Dad raised me to be the man I am today. I am so thankful for that.

I told my wife this story, and she responded, "I've never been so proud that you're my husband." That woman is incredible, and I am blessed. Our puppy is pretty awesome too.

Happy thanksgiving, and remember to tip heavy on the holidays; the servers at your local restaurant probably are working so that they can afford something for the holiday.

Be good to one another.

and of course...

Stay thirsty,
Eric

Concerning Pisco

I still remember my first Pisco Sour.

I really can only imagine what a slack-jawed fool I looked like as I saw my good friend and bartending mentor, Alex Davin, reached for a raw egg, and gracefully separate the white into his tin.

“Are you baking a cake?” I asked incredulously.

“Shut the f*** up and watch,” he replied in a far-off tone. I knew when he was concentrating.

“There are three drinks that mark the quality of any bartender out there,” he began, “the Manhattan, the Sazerac, and the Pisco Sour. The first one most beginners can fumble through. The second indicates that the bartender may be better than average. The last; however, means that you have someone who knows how to mix making your drink.”  I would never forget this moment.

I began to understand a well-kept secret that bartenders who truly understood their craft had long kept. Pisco, an un-aged brandy originated from Peru and Chile, is one of the most versatile liquors out there. While vodka fundamentally lacks any sort of flavor on it’s own and is merited on its smoothness, Pisco’s subtle notes of citrus, herbs, or fruits (depending on what you are tasting) are what make it the complex and well deserved patron saint of those who mix.  It does not insist upon itself like whisky or gin, and it does not embarrass you in front of your friends like tequila. It doesn’t swear like rum. Pisco is like my dog: content in itself, happy to change, and easy to be around.

As someone who loves infusions, Pisco offers the most complimentary flavor to create something new. I make a Pumpkin Pisco Sour that will knock your socks off. I serve a Pineapple infused Pisco punch that is refreshing in all seasons. In fact, in every menu that I design and serve, I make sure that there is at least one Pisco cocktail on the list for the already-converted or those seeking the gospel.

There is an increasingly exciting world of alcohol that is being discovered by the once dominated world of vodka, gin, rum, and tequila. Much like with soccer, Americans are beginning to open up to what the rest of the world is doing in regards to their drinks and really seeing what other liquors there are to offer. Pisco represents the singular joy I get in the response to when a guest asks me to make something “I’ve never had,” because I’m almost always reaching for the nearest bottle of Pisco behind my bar. 

Get out there, drinkers, and don’t be afraid to let your bartender mix you something that you’ve never had before.

I would just suggest you taste their Manhattan or their Sazerac first.

SOS: Shutdown in DC

My preamble for this post is two fold.

First, there are three things people say you should never discuss at a bar: Politics, religion, and sports. The last of these three is impossible so don't bother ignoring it. The middle is always right, but the first is hard to avoid in Washington, DC, where I now manage a Lounge.

Second, those of you who know me know that I have a history in politics. I was quite good at it. However; I made the choice to get into this industry.  I think it has taken a uniquely bi-partisan effort to this adequately fuck up the government, but at this point the Republicans are being sore losers. If Cruz had ever been in a fight in his life, he would've already had a lesson I learned when I got my ass kicked for the first time when I was 11: sometimes you lose. Suck it up.

Now, onto what this post is really about.

I need your help.

See, there is an unseen victim to this government shutdown. Everyone knows that by our esteemed members of congress throwing a temper tantrum,  they are screwing hundreds of thousands of federal employees, people who just want to do a job, out of their money. But all of this is hurting a second group two. People just like me.

As many of you know, the DC license plate boldly says "Taxation without representation." Why, some may ask? Well, unlike most of my readers, I don't have a Senator or Congressman that I can call up and say, "Hey, asshole, do your job and stop acting like a child." DC lacks representation. What is the most ironic out of all of this is that the local businesses in DC are the ones being hit the hardest. See, Nationally, 14.9% of jobs are public sector. Here in our nation's capital, its closer to 30%. I am lucky and have not been feeling the crushing effects of the shutdown as bad as some, but with the debt ceiling looming, federal catering events are canceling.

Ryan, a good friend of mine, told me yesterday "It was a ghost town on U Street. The first weekend was fun with shutdown parties but people are legit nervous now. They're saving their money."

Understand that the service industry ceases to exist with nobody to serve.

I know the members of Congress don't give a shit about anyone in DC because we don't get them elected, but call your Congressmen. Call your senators. Let them know that its more than the parks and the federal employees. It's the entire food-chain that they are toying with. All because they are throwing a temper tantrum.

I think that house republicans and democrats need to sit down, have a shot, have a cocktail, have another shot, and get all of this out of their system. Clear the air and actually talk to each other. En Vino Vertias.

In fact, come down to Mate Lounge. If you promise to actually negotiate, first round is on me.

...But I won't hold my breath.

The Old Fashioned

The fall is upon us, and everywhere whisky drinkers rejoice.

The fall is my favorite season. The turning of the leaves and the dropping of the temperatures somehow make my pale complexion and bald head and beard look just a bit less stupid. It also means that marathon eating days are upon us (Thanksgiving and Christmas. Yes. Just, YES.) and that whisky just tastes better. Something about a scotch on a cold day feels appropriate. Though for bartenders everywhere, this can be a harrowing season.

Unlike the mojito, which  even the greenest of bartenders can throw together, whisky cocktails are like angry wives; not to be handled by amateurs. Manhattans are a the measuring stick by which I measure other bartenders, as taught to me by my teacher, but Old Fashioned's are another monster entirely.

Much like peace in the middle east and the Batman vs. Superman conflict, how to make a perfect old fashioned is not agreed upon and can actually draw blood. I've seen it.

I've decided to let the Master handle this one. Those of you who have read my blog before know my good friend and teacher, Bear. I asked him about the old fashioned. Here's what he had to say.

Alex Davin, Lincoln

Do you like whisky?
Ahhhh, yea, that would be a yes. Next.

Just...yes.

What's an example of a bad OF?
Oh, I've had 100. You walk into a bar you don't know and think about getting a fancier drink but gotta dip in your toe to test the water, my go to is a Manhattan. It's classic but simple, and really is used to see how good the bartender is. If a bartender can make a decent Manhattan, I feel better about gambling with an Old Fashioned.

Muddled Old Fashioned's are popular and are a travesty. They're neon red grape colored and filled with all the crappy stuff. I've had a few and I say keep the garbage out of my drink. I don't want a salad I want a drink."

The best example of a bad OF is probably the time that you were going to roll out your newest menu and I needed to teach you one last lesson. We went to a newly opened DC bar on an off night (tuesday, I think...) and looked at the menu. It had some classic cocktails on there, so we ordered a few. I ordered the drink that was a play on an OF, and you ordered the pisco sour.

*Eric's note: that pisco sour was truly horrific. Egg yoke in the drink. Nightmares are founded on less.

We had one sip so you could understand the lesson: your staff will undoubtedly fuck up your recipes. Sorry. That's life. I made you take one or two more after so you wouldn't forget it.

We tipped and left. It takes a deft hand to make [an old fashioned] well.

What's the biggest mistake that bartenders make when making an OF?

Muddled fruit. I know people that like it are of an older generation, but it just ruins it! That and bartenders go too light on the bitters. Don't be afraid, I need more than a dash.

What Whisky do you prefer to use?
High proof bourbon or a bold rye (over 100 proof, maybe bonded)

It's a man's drink, its supposed to kick you in the ass.

Will you share your recipe?
Not a huge secret.

Make rich simple syrup (2pts sugar in the raw to 1 part water)
Puddle upsimple syr the bottom of the mixing glass (I don't measure, depends on the whisky, but usually around a half ounce)
5 dash angostura (That's right! FIVE!)
2 oz whisky, some people call, I like to default to Jim Beam Rye
Build the cocktail with no ice to have the bitters mix into the simple syrup, add ice and strain onto an oversized 2x2 ice cube, garnish with a big orange zest and home-made bourbon cherries.

What's the funniest story of that drink being sent back?
Well, this guy came in, young early 20s on a date, not a first date but not far off, and asked for an OF. I made it with the forementioned recipe, which in my unbiased opinion is fucking delicious.

The guy comes up to the bar from a table and asks: "Where's the muddled fruit?"

Well, that's the way we make it here," I reply. He quickly says, "but the muddled fruit is the best part!"

So I "fixed" it, but it was weird having a giant ice cube with muddled fruit. Though as you know, people like to drink the way they like to drink, but I just think my way is better.

Failure

I am not good at failing.

It's no secret to anyone who knows me that I hate to lose. I am competitive by nature. This drives my wife crazy because I need to win. Adversaries make me work hard, and their doubt makes me work harder.

"I like the idea, but you have failed in the execution," my owner told me as I served him a dish that Chef and I worked tirelessly on.

It was a bit of a shock to me; I'm not used to failure. It was the certainty of the word "failure" that really hit me. He didn't suggest it needed to be tweaked. He didn't say "It's ok, but I don't love it." He told me I failed.

And he was right.

It took me a bit of time to really surrender to that realization, but once I did, I found myself almost relieved. As the General Manager of Mate Lounge, it is my charge to come out with a brand new food and drink menu for the fall. This, for those of you who don't know, is a daunting task.

The owner of the Lounge asked me if I had read his blog, which I had. It's appropriately called "I Love Failure" and it turned out that his use of the dreaded "F" word was far more honest than I was expecting or prepared for.

It is not often that you get to speak with someone who has succeeded (and failed, as it turns out) in so many ventures in his life. I assume that he saw me go tight-lipped and stopped and said "Now that you know you have failed, try something different."

I share this because of the importance of persistence in these little moments. Creative pursuits such as food and drink are beset on all sides with traps that you can fall into, and losing sight that sometimes everyone doesn't share the quirks of your pallet is a dangerous game. Sometimes you just have to let go.

So, I kept working. And Mate's new food and drink menu is dangerously close to being done.

Thomas Edison, besides being a thief and a bit of a fraud (See: The Oatmeal Comic on Tesla and how Edison stole his ideas....) did say something I find very useful:

"I have not failed 10,000 times. I have successfully found 10,000 ways that will not work."

Don't be afraid to fail. It doesn't hurt as bad as it seems.